Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Can you See the Box?

On Saturday evening our heater broke. Ryan pulled out the fuses and thought that that was our problem since our unit is brand new. He left the fuse out for me so that I could stop by the store on Monday to have it checked. No problem. But, by Sunday evening Ryan had alternate plans. This is how our conversation went down.

Ryan: I've been thinking about how to keep our house warm.

Me: If it involves anything other than calling our heater guy and getting him to fix our heater, I don't want to hear this.

Ryan: Laughing. There were these people that were protesting oil drilling. They bought big oil drums and painted them black. They filled them with water and put them on their fences. It ended up heating their whole house.

Me: So, you want to buy oil drums, paint them black, fill them with water and put them on our fence? Yeah, that'll look good. This is ridiculous, Ryan!

Ryan: No, I have an idea of something that I can make in the yard to keep the house warm.

Me: Laughing. We can keep our house warm by fixing the heater. You know, Ryan, some people use the phrase thinking outside of the box when someone has a good idea. But can you see the box Ryan? Where is the box? You are so far away from the box that you cannot see it? I want you to keep a finger on the box at all times.

Retarded absolutely retarded. Just get the heater fixed! Now, I know that you are probably disappointed that you will not see his white trash invention come to fruition, but I think you can handle it. There's only enough room for a few white trash ideas around these parts.

When retelling this tale to Ryan's family I've also coined a name for my stand up comedy routine wherein I am Becky's opening act, my portion of the gig is called, "White Trash Genius"! I think I'll be rakin' in the dough!


  1. I will hold him down and sit on him while the heater guy fixes it for you if you need me too. I agree with you, get the thing fixed already.

  2. John thinks that far away from the box too! When we were still in Tempe and getting our house he anted to build a big hole covered with sheet plastic covered with a foot of dirt. This would collect water for us to use. I could not even begin to convince him that this wouldn't work. He just wants to live off the grid so bad.

  3. I can't believe I never heard this crazy story about Ryan until I remembered you had this blog. I was laughing outloud. By the way, at least his "box" isn't full of Transformers.